As the ashes settle from the fierce semi-final battles we are finally able to get a glimpse of who will be our new champion. Will it be Chris, with his 9-4 record and coming off a 4 game winning streak? Or will it be the underdog Nate, who just sqeaked into the playoffs but is riding a massive win over the previously unbeatable Kira? Only time will tell and with only 1.5 points separating them it will certainly be an exciting game.
As fun as watching that game might be nothing is better to me than explaining just how horrible Anthea's and Kira's teams were in the semi-finals. Anthea, you put up a respectable showing, though I'm sure that even you never thought you had a chance. You being in the playoffs this year was just a mockery of justice. Now, Kira, on the other hand, Oh yeah, thats the good stuff. 10 points was all that separated you from getting into the finals and you decide to play Jordan " I'ma punch a helmet " Reed.
This is your team:
Just look at that dumb motherfucker. After solidly connecting with a piece of metal this stupid bastard squares up yet again! A perfect ending to your almost perfect season. Your disapointment is almost palpable, tell me, was losing this week as bad for your psyche as seeing Chris naked for the first time? Or is that experience still the worst thing that's ever happened to you? Either way I'm sure the two will haunt you for years to come.
Race for the Douche:
Rob - 162
Kyle - 141
Devon - 112
When your experience level in masturbating has reached the pinnacle of the field and have been established as an expert in the field.
My girlfriend caught me doctorbating and was impressed with my level of skill achieved.
Game 1: Chris 106 vs. Anthea 77 - With a 30 point differential this game was nowhere near close. Chris gets over 20 points once again from E.Elliott and supprisingly over 20 from the Miami D. Anthea gets a shit outing from T.Rawls with 3 points to end her championship hopes.
Game 2: Nate 106 vs. Kira 96 - Nate makes a couple of risky plays this week that work out amazingly. Playing both the Atlanta running backs was a bold move but netted him 35 points, and playing T.Gabriel gets him 12. Kira cant pull out a 12th win and with J.Reed getting ejected, 0 points finds its way to her.
Play with your balls!